Mine

While I feel this poem really doesn’t require any explanation, and usually I like to leave interpretation up the reader, this short poem perfectly describes the point I have arrived at in my life.

For the majority of my past, I put the potential for love above all else. Even as a kid (and an avid reader) I read primarily romance novels or books with romantic sub-plots. I lived for romance movies. For birthdays, when blowing out the candles, I would wish to find love. I said many times that I was in love with the idea of love. When anyone asked what I thought my reason for being was, my answer was always to find love. Be loved. For what is the point of living if not to have love?

And when I was in a relationship, I tended to put my significant other before me in almost all cases. If they needed something from me, I gave it, even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness. In all of my past relationships, it was inevitable that I found myself giving more than I was getting in return.

While I feel there is nothing wrong with being a good, generous partner and making sure your S/O is happy, I have learned that there is a line that should never be crossed, and that line is neglecting yourself in order to make others happy. This is something that I have done to the detriment of myself, and inevitably those relationships as well.

I have now been single for almost two years. It was not always something that I’ve wanted, but I have come to found a peace within myself that I never had before. I am comfortable being alone. I can make myself happy, and I am happy within myself.

During this time of solitude, I have explored myself more than I ever dared take the time to before. Instead of focusing on others, I have been focusing solely on myself and what it is that drives me in this life. I have moved to a different state all on my own. I have pursued a dream job that I had put off for the sake of others. I have made unpopular life decisions purely because it was what I desired. What others thought was of no consequence to me. Every move I have made has been of my own volition.

If you asked me now who I am and what makes me me, I could tell you. If you asked me what I love about myself and what dreams I have, I could tell you.

I know who I am without a man.

I know who I am without love.

And I’ve realized that I am not here on Earth to be loved by a man or to serve a man. I do not need someone to “complete me.” I am here because I have my very own special and unique gifts. I, by myself, without anyone else, bring something to this world that cannot be offered by anyone else.

And most importantly — what has taken me twenty-five years to learn — I finally love myself for exactly who I am.




  1 comment for “Mine

  1. Tracey Ferguson
    March 6, 2019 at 4:58 am

    What a wonder place to be in your life! Self discovery is exciting and wonderful and amazing, enjoy the ride❤💕

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Pomegranate Books

indie bookstore wilmington nc

Wanda Luthman's Children's Books

An Author of Children's Books; A Blog to Encourage Good Character in Children

Luna

Every now and then my head is racing with thoughts so I put pen to paper

Writing for Kids (While Raising Them)

Blog & website of children's book author Tara Lazar

bookloverjo

On a mission to find the right book for every child and encourage reading for pleasure

Kid Lit Reviews

Honest, Thoughtful Reviews

A Kids Book A Day

Reviewing a children's book from 2019 every day

The Pen-Dragon

A Writer. An Imagination. Worlds of Possibility.

Words & Watercolor

Book Reviewer, Poet, and Artist

Discover

A daily selection of the best content published on WordPress, collected for you by humans who love to read.

The Atavist Magazine

Book Reviewer, Poet, and Artist

Longreads

The best longform stories on the web

The WordPress.com Blog

The latest news on WordPress.com and the WordPress community.

%d bloggers like this: